Your Grief = Your Rules


Grief is confusing.  It’s disorientating and it’s messy.  And that can make it really hard to express what we need and to set boundaries with friends and family.

This isn’t just confusing for us.  It’s also confusing for those around us.

If you are anything like me, you may be noticing that your needs change by the day, with each person and by the moment.  Sometimes what felt comfortable one day was horrible and intolerable the next.  There were days when I was desperate to hear my daughter’s name spoken out loud by someone else.  I wanted to be asked about her.   I wanted my loss to be acknowledged and supported.  The next day, I wanted to hide from the world and any conversation at all was just too sharp and painful.

So what do you do when people challenge you on where you stand?

That’s the topic I’m addressing today.  This video is going to help you to stand your ground with friends and family, even when it feels like the ground underneath you is constantly shifting and might even be made out of quicksand.

This is going to help you in the moments when you are feeling overwhelmed and misunderstood.

Here’s some of my key points:

  • You are allowed to change your mind, even if that is confusing or frustrating to those around you
  • Grief is a moving landscape so it is critical to give yourself lots of room to explore and change direction
  • Giving yourself this space is a key requirement in being able to fully heal, expand and grow through this experience
  • You have the right to reassess and adjust your boundaries whenever you need to
  • You don’t have to justify your needs.  It’s enough to know what they are.
  • If it’s your grief, then it’s your rules.  Simple as that.


Thank you to the person who sent me the idea for this topic.   And if you found this video helpful, I would love it if you shared it to help me on my mission to break the silence and isolation of loss.

Are you interested in taking your healing to the next level?  If so, I have good news. I’m opening up a few new spots for new clients.  Learn more about working with me here

Thanks and see you next time,



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