Lately I have been getting a lot of questions about how to cope with pregnant friends after loss and how to avoid getting upset when you see other moms with their babies.
This is such an incredibly painful, difficult experience and one that we seem to be faced with every time we turn around. So I put together this 4 minute video to share 3 main tips that I discussed during my last periscope broadcast. (you can join my free Q & A’s at www.periscope.tv/lovelossproject ).
We need to be honest & realistic with ourselves here.
Of course we are happy that good things are happening for our friends, but when we are grieving, it is absolutely impossible to not feel shattered inside by all the reminders of what we had taken from us. And that can make some of our friendships really challenging right now.
These ripples in our social circles are just another cruel part of the experience of baby loss. Not only do we have to deal with the heartbreak of losing our little ones, but on top of that we often feel horrible and ashamed of the fact that we’re not able to be “a good friend” to others. This can create a lot of distance around us and can makes us feel even more alone and even more misunderstood.
So I hope this video helps to relieve any pressure that you may be putting on yourself right now and reminds you that you are not alone.
And if you like this video, please share it with a friend who is going through her own experience of loss or who wants to understand the grief of baby loss a little better. Thank you!
[…] spot on. I encourage anyone that knows someone that has experienced a loss (at any stage) to watch this video. She shares all the feelings we have that I could never eloquently express in this […]
Thank you so much for this. People just don’t understand the grief we are going through after the loss of a baby, it’s nice to read and watch things by fellow loss mommys who get it. A few weeks ago was the one month anniversary of my baby James’ birth and death. The day before that a friend almost shoved it in my face that she was pregnant. While I am happy for her, she really had no tact or sympathy whatsoever in how she told me.
I’m sorry you have to deal with that kind of insensitivity from your friend. Unfortunately there is so much of that that we have to navigate sometimes.
This might help make some of that a bit easier:
Sending love & light to you and James
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